Dr Bam Bam

BB finally got around to wearing his doctor outfit that he got for his birthday today. It's aged 5-6 and hangs off him, because apparently dressing up is all about things being to big for you, says MPLST.

Turns out he's got potential. He put me in the recovery position 4 times, whilst only standing on my family allowance once. Even Dr BB couldn't bring Tinky Winky to life though. (And yes, if I could rally be arsed using photoshop, the glass in those doors would look clean!)

After that we ventured to the great outdoors and up to the Caterthuns.

BB walked up and down and knows that we're taking mum next time. Don't say you've not been warned.

Scatterbrain

You really do get like those you live with.
This afternoon, we squeezed into the car with a friend and her daughter and went to St Andrews aquarium. Just as we got to the first display R squared got themselves down on to their tummies and pressed their faces up to the glass. Would have made a cracking pic, if only some dipstick had remembered to replace the memory card after blogging last night. Doh!

The big boy enjoyed the fish, and the seals. The journey down was amusing. LL crashed out - no surprise there. BB was desperate to sleep too, but the poor wee man was so keen to indulge the lovely Rachel in conversation that he couldn't. To be fair to young Rachel, she is the only person I know who can out talk the two generations that went before her, so he was really up against it today. On the bright side, he's fed, watered and sleeping before 8pm tonight.

The little boy was in the backpack, but I think he was more impressed with the lighting than the aquatic life on display.

On the way home, there was a terrible smell, and for a brief period, we thought that one of our passengers had had number twos. Turned out to be a false alarm, so we can only conclude that the smell actually was Dundee itself.

Speaking of keech though, the true highlight of the day happened on our return home. BB was taking his afternoon dump on his potty, and insisted that Rachel's mummy wipe his bottom. Well, who am I to argue? Rachel's mummy duly obliged, but what somewhat concerned at the sheer mass your boy had shifted - "That's more than I do in a week" said she with a look for utter disbelief.

He's still got it!

Krypton Factor Here We Come

You'll be impressed with your eldest today. We took the car to the village and parked at this end, and he rode his bike all the way to playgroup from there. I even locked it up and did the same on the way home, so as far as he's concerned, he cycled to and from playgroup today.

We've had a battle of wills today - I think I'm coming second. He's been on the naughty step twice and you know how reluctantly I use that. In fact, just as I was putting him to bed and giving him the "you've been a little naughty today, you'll have to learn to do what daddy tells you tomorrow" lecture, he cut me off mid sentence to tell me I was his friend. Butter wouldn't melt I tell you.....

Anyhoos, this afternoon we ventured to a new play park on a recommendation from the yummiest mummy (now that you're on leave you understand) at toddlers. Turns out she'd been told it was good, but couldn't find it - I had more success. Here's a few pics of the loons-

There was an death slide too which I managed to take BB on. He went on it twice himself, but I had to run along side, so I wasn't able to get a decent pic. There's also a swing over the river too, but I didn't show him that you'll be glad to hear.

Cracked It?

I'm back to being responsible for just the two weans again. I'm undecided if 3 is actually easier than 2 in many respects, since SS and BB keep each other amused most of the time making my life easier. That said, if I didn't have the stress of dealing with the SS's loony tune old dear, then it would pretty much have been a stress free weekend. Note to self: Pick an opportune moment 10 or so years from now and warn the boys about the dangers of big boobs and blond hair.

Sunday has been semi successful. We managed to go back to the village and have a cycle, this time stopping at the park because it was a nicer day. I found it harder to keep up with BB on foot today, and (rather consistently now) he fell off again when he spotted Maia. I don't think BB is worried about her dad being there because of the old "my dad's bigger than your's" thing, but I've explained that he's on his own if he gets her in any trouble! (I've also pointed out that she is very clearly blond)

BB couldn't possibly swing any higher. Oh, and I'm not doing a Babs on the kids. Then insisted on keeping their jackets on, despite the sunshine. Both of them now know that bright colours make you easier to spot when you're peddling. (I'll make proper bikers out of them yet!)

If there was any turmoil in my day, it was deciding when to eat and travel as I risked upsetting either small bellies, bed times or you know who. I opted to stuff the small bellies early, which worked a treat. The Domestic God in me created a Sunday roast all 4 of us enjoyed, and there's even 2 healthy portions in the freezer for LL.

BB had a spell playing with his take home gift from yesterdays party. He even tried to water his bean with it. I must have filled it about 20 times.

There'll be no pics tomorrow. Got a course, so boys off to MIL. Early start for Shaunie Boy.

Domestic Shaunie came to the fore this morning. All my chores were done, and the kids managed a cycle around the village with LL in the backpack. Now that I've straightened out most of the crap that someone very very far away left me, things are in better shape around here.

That left LL plenty time for a kip before a 2nd birthday party this afternoon. Just what the stay at home dad needs - lots of mums gloating and trotting out the all too predictable "now you'll see how hard it is for us" line. Honestly, I think some of them are hoping that this all goes horribly pear shaped just to show that a man can't possibly do it. I've been stewing on some of this, but I'll leave that rant for another day.....

I didn't take the camera to the party, which is a shame because BB looks strangely similar to Mr Bean on speed when he's on a trampoline. I did take a pic of the kids before we left though, all sporting their Friday night pulling gear. A typical family portrait I suspect - point the camera at the baby and he cries. Middle one is soooo excited he can't hide it. Oldest one has that kind of glaikit fake smile going on. I can't get a decent pic of her at the mo.

Friday - The New Monday?

No end of week pick me up for Shaunie Boy this week. A morning which consisted of listening to a gaggle of auld hens convincing themselves that motherhood is such a travesty, before heading off on a 2 hour round trip to pick up SS that wasn't made any easier with a diversion that takes out half of Dundee on the way back. Handy at tea time!

A few things stuck out though. Apart from the new mantra of "Why daddy, why? Why? Why? Why? Why daddy? Why?........." we also have a new one. "To the rescue" repeated non stop for as long as he loses the curious feeling. Actually, it's more "Tooooo de yeaaaaaaahscoooooooooooo" - he's not cracked R's yet. Kind of unfortunate given his name.

So, the highlight of my Friday was a) having 3 kids that eat the meal I cooked and b) a trip to Somerfield where I could buy fruit Clubs and my very own selection of fruit and nut biscuits.

The wonder of my self induced high was compounded when MPLST let me know that she can't get to where she's going until Monday, and so is "taking it easy" in a hotel room all weekend. My heart bleeds.

Ip Dip You're It

She really has gone and done it. As I write now, MPLST is probably somewhere over the Med en route to deepest darkest Africa. The client has assured her that it is perfectly safe to travel - things have apparently calmed down to normal but the dust til dawn curfew remains in place. How comforting.

So, from today, until next weekend, it will be my job to post a daily blog for her benefit. Note to wife: I intend doing a better job than you did through my last trip! There should be plenty pics of the boys, though obviously not up to Her Ladyship's standard of photography. Got to go....there is the distinct aroma of keech close by, and for once I can't blame the wife.

Back again, the calmness has descended. Almost time to give a progress report for day 1 before I crash and burn. For those that want to know, I got a text saying MPLST had arrived safe and sound.

LL has, as we thought he would, adjusted just fine to not having mum around. The wee shite didn't want anything to do with me for my first couple of days home, but we're best mates again. I failed the first daddy test tonight though - the poor wee soul fell off the sofa and bust his nose this evening - I should have seen this coming when I donned a white top this morning! At least I'm consistent - BB fell off the couch the first time we were home alone too.

BB and I managed to go and play hide and seek amongst the bales of hay this afternoon.

The cake at the top is MPLST's latest effort - BB is very pleased to be 3.

The weekend promises to be eventful. I pick up SS from school tomorrow afternoon.

Can't wait!

Wrong Wrong Wrong!

That little headline is live on the web as I write.

How many different ways can a watch show them time?
And how many different ways are there to derived sexual pleasure?

Surely the 10 and the 50 should be with the other subject matter?